let me breathe

lagi ub. gw sempet stres kmaren malem. gila. kan tadi tuh mtk, prancis, sm pkn. nah gw kmaren les jam 4 (tadinya gw maunya jam 3 tapi guru gw telat dtgnya), selesai jam 8 tapi ga maksimal lah trus jam 9 gw mulai buka buku lagi gw ringkas lagi tuh mat tapi pikiran gw anjrit kemana2 nyet stres bngt, mikir bu kd rada2 lah karena dia ga ngerti apa 3 pelajaran sehari tuh ga bakal bisa maksimal masuk smuanya ke otak?! ya mungkin kalo jaman dia dulu bisa ya karna teknologi belom secanggih skarang, makanya orang tua tuh skarang ngomel2 mulu " gimana sih kamu, dulu tuh orang ga ada yang males!" dll ya karna GA ADA GODAAN tau huh apa2an dan dulu kata bokap gw sendiri ya, ad bbrp plajaran, dia liat plajaran gw, itu tuh baru diajarin pas kuliah! anjir2 emang dasar indonesia tuh apa2n sih gw lama2 jadi bete juga tau. gini ya gw aja adaptasi 3 tahun baru bisa memaksimalkan daya dan kapasitas serta ability buat sesuai dengan indo, belom cobaan kaya 3 pelajaran sehari gini gila apa.. GA ADA YG MAKSIMAL TAU NGGA! pengen marah2 rasanya kmaren gw pengen update status facebook susah amat, ga bisa2

oh ya dan 1 hal lagi yg bikin gw ksel adalah: kmaren mlm si my-used-to-be-"bestfriend" sms gw. apa2an sih! "Nab. Pa kbr?"
woaah bikin emosi aja dan ALHAMDULILLAH! GW UDAH NGA ADA FLUTTERING FEELINGS ANYMORE YEAAAYAYAYAY iam OFFICIALLY NEUTRALIZED muahaha.
ya gw bales aja,
buruk ki (oops seharusnya disensor tapi ya ga apalah). masih blajar buat ub. how do you know im still awake? (since he usually texts me like 9.30 paling malem kalo hari skolah krn dia juga capek). kmren itu udah 21.48an lah.
dia blg. "oh. haha, i didnt know. gw ub mulai hari rabu. gw gangu ya?"
(ya, jelas lo ganggu, haha tapi kasar ah ntar dia bneran marah sm gw, gw sih ga mo cari musuh tapi menghindar secara halus ah)
gw pn menjawab, "oh rabu. iya ganggu bngt. hahaha, ya kpn2 ya ngobrolnya. sorry, night"
TUH! masih halus kan? ya bagus lah, masi mending ada ha2 nya. kalo ngga bisa dikira sebel bneran, hahah. ketauan deh. yaudah gw mau tidur dlu capek bner kmrn jam 23.30 tidur dan resenya adek gw tidak memiliki kesadaran utk bangun lebih awal dan mandi dluan! udah kelas 4 masih kaya anak kecil! tidur semau hati! (hah ngamuk)

yaudah. laters.

My 5 recent self-realizations!

1. iam more and more obsessed with wheat-based food. tiap kali nyium bau roti, pasta, serealia dan semacamnya, gw pasti langsung pengen makan itu, walaupun udah kenyang dan baru makan. ya ampun, sumpah gw ngga tau knapa! padahal kalo buat golongan darah O (kata buku diet golongan darah sehat sih), gandum tuh mesti dihindari, karena it makes the blood clot and stuff. zz. dairy produts juga, walaupun gw ngga sesering itu minum susu dan makan yoghurt, keju, eskrim sebanyak gandum sih. ya tetep aja, semuanya aja yang gw suka dilarang! haha

2. i like my 'alone-environment'. ya bukan berarti gw introvert banget orangnya, tapi beneran deh kan adek gw itu tidurnya ngga sekamar sama gw, dan gw sejak kelas.. 3 sd kali ya udah tidur sendiri krn dia ngga mau tidur sm gw krn takut gelap (waktu itu dia masih 2 taunan), eh malah keterusan skarang. gw bingung kapan ya dia tidur sndiri? dia itu ngga punya kamar tetap, kadang tidur sama ortu gw, kadang sama nenek-kakek gw. ya itu ga penting, intinya gw suka dengan kesendirian gw itu, gw suka suasana privatenya where i can be myself and do whatever i like. BUT I WANT MY OLD ROOM! ITS WAY BIGGER THAN THE RECENT ONE huuh

3. im only interested in a relationship with ONLY someone i have known for at least 2 years. yes, i found that out from a friend of mine, dia blg ke sesorang yg nanya ke dia, nama disamarkan untuk kesejahteraan bersama*

"jadi gw mesti gimana dong? (sama nabila)"
tmen gw: " ya udah deh lo ngga ada harapan lagi, kecuali lo nunggu, dia tuh maunya sama orang yang udah dia knal lama!"
he replied: "jadi.. gw mesti nunggu sampe kuliah dong?"

HUAHAHA sumpah gw ngakak diceritain gitu! tadinya gw ngga sadar. iam a bit picky, i guess. tapi kan its for my own good, gw ngga mau jadian sama orang yg ga bawa manfaat (membawa lo ke jurang kesalahan siapa yang mau sih?) buat gw. ngga sih gw ngga terlalu nuntut, semuanya bakal dateng by itself kok so im not really 'searching' for someone. i'll probably end up with a good old friend! hahah its quite funny and menggelitik actually, the thought of that.. shiver*

4. iam interested with either; smart, sporty, or funny guys.
nyah, thats not really a secret anymore (if you have already realized). cowo itu mesti lebih pinter dari gw (biar gw bisa nanya and he can help me when im confused, lol), dan ga cuma itu jadi mesti berwawasan luas juga.. sporty? oh yes thats bin my criteria since PRIMARY lol!!!! i dont know why maybe becoz they look healthy and dedicated to it. i like that. as for funny, well i guess every guy that ive liked are all funny, they freakin joke around or tease me actually most start from THAT. its annoying at first but when u get to kinow him better and how he is, i get ADDICTED to his jokes and actually crave more (hoping that he would say sumthing funny the next day HAHAH sssht its a secret)

5. i dont like being judged/considered as the always nice girl.
ih sumpah itu nyebelin banget, thats why ive decided to learn to say NO. i dont want ppl to take advantage of me! and ive changed, i mean in junior high ppl might consider me as a shy person but really, i think thats becoz they dont know me well enough. its an insult! so shut up, im pissed. lol. im not shy. i mean ive grown, in senior high ive really gained my confidence in everything, and im more open to do silly things (which i can be, sumtimes) spontaneously.

oh sumthing else, they think im always cheerful, like i dont have any problems at all. fuck. thats why when i get ANGRY (ooh you dont want to see that do you), they get SHOCKED and in the end they act nice in front of me muahahahhahaa itu kocak banget yaaa (for the ppl in XI IPA 1, im sorry but u know that now hahah)

sepertinya itu dulu ya sekarang. hehe mau blajar nih, kalo mau ikut pick my mum up at the airport tomorrow afternoon. laters xo

The Ditching Day

jadi, kmaren tuh pada bilang ga mau masuk, krn sekarang2 ini kita lagi masuk jam 11.30 krn kls 2 lagi tryout. udah gitu 2 jam pelajaran=40 menit, gila mau dapet apa lo dari situ? akhirnya kan belom terputuskan secara kelas gitu kan, pad amau masuk apa ngga, masih dalam pikiran masing2 ( ya mungkin secara berkelompok kali). gw dkk juga niatnya mau kerumah aul ngerjain tugas OR trus ngegahul deh.

akhirnya setelah menerima sms kmaren yg ga masuk 10 orang di telfonin lah sama walikelasnya, dll gw pergi juga ke rumah aul sm lintang. samope disitu, kita nunggu mayang, indah, sama muharom (iya si nyebelin itu walaupun dia emang baik sih sebenernya), kita ngerjain tugas (gw sama mayang doang yg lain main salon2an ngeritingin rambut lah apa lah haha). tiba2 ada telfon;

Bimo: Bil, kelasnya dimana sih?
Gw: Hah? hahaa gw ngak masuk nih bim
Bimo: Oh? okedeh sip inisekelaspadamaucabutsoalnya, thanks ya!
(ya kurang lebih seperti itu lah apa yg dia katakan)

eh 5 menit kemudian...

Audi: Nabila, nabila dimana?
Gw: Ngga masuk di.
Audi: Hah? ya ampun! aah gimanadongini bu darni udah di kelas gitu dan blablablablabla ga jelas gitu!
Gw: yaudah, pulang aja!
Audi: Iya deh nab iyaya thanks ya nab

iye dah. yang pada salonan ketawa.

trus kita ke pim, makan, trus ktmu si fanny deh disitu. abis itu kita ke sport station tuh si aul nyari baju renang, liat2 eh pas mau turun, gw liat di bawah ada rina sama nyokapnya! haha cabuts juga dia. ternyata tuh katanya yg ke skolah pada cabut akhirnya z z. yaudah stelah ngobrol bentar, kita ke gramed krn pada mau beli pulpen, buku dsb.

abis itu kan niatnya mau cool down di JCO, eh si indah mayang fanny pengen ke metro (krn lg puncak2nya big sale tuh mreka pad amau liat sepatu), eh SUMPAH LUCU2!! aaaaaa mesti ajak bokap banget kesana besok! gw berpikir. (krn nyokap gw belom balik).
stelah melihat2 dan berangan2 akhirnya kita ke dalem, liat2 dress gitu eh akhirnya nyoba, SI FANNY TERNYATA BAWA CAMDIG ya ampuuuuun ga dikeluarin daritadi, ngga bilang2 hah ga ada foto deh rame2 haha. akhirnya kan gw fanny lintang fitting tuh, trus si fanny blg, eh foto yuk! akhirnya foto deh haha

ya krn udah jam 4 akhirnya si mayang mau pulang krn rumahnya kan jauh bisa 2 jam kalo ga salah. yasu akhirnya kita memutuskan utk pulang. rencananya sih kapan2 kita mau nginep trus main2 dressup dandan gitu lol. azek

tuesday morning

hahah.. iseng2

- if only you werent a faggot.


"Be My Somebody"

I'm too foggy today,
To know what you're sayin',
Your lips are moving so fast,
And I just keep praying,
For them to slow down,
So I can make some sense,
Of the words that are pouring out,
Of your crooked spout.

Last night was a record to be broken,
It broke all over the kitchen floor,
Oh no don't you go,
I'm coming back with a rag,
To wipe away the haze from the days,
We've forgotten all about.

So be my somebody tonight,
Be the one who'll hold me tight,
Honey, please, please,
Cuz I've been so all alone,
And no one will pick up the phone,
So honey, please stay.

I held your head up, do you remember?
When you wanted to make a blanket outta me,
Oh I can't lie ... I been keeping score,
And it's your turn to wring me out,
And lay me down to dry.

So be my somebody tonight,
Be the one who'll hold me tight,
Honey, please, please,
Cuz I've been so all alone,
And no one will pick up the phone,
So honey, please stay,
Honey, please stay,
Honey, please stay.

*Norah Jones

deviantart frenzy

okay i shouldve written here yesterday instead BUT since i couldnt get on the computer.. well i'll just have to write it now.

u know i checked my deviantart yesterday and guess what??? word cut-outs made "neutralization" a favourite! whoaowowowoaw! now THATS something to be proud of! becoz i rly love her works and she really.. inspires people to write! plus she is either downright depressed (TO THE CORE hell ye) or she's such a mysterious person who has extra-ability to play with words! LOL shes awesomee.. gaah i admire her :D btw shes british.. hmm i woner how old she is but i have a feeling that shes not far from our age.. really her writing is soo intricate (im not sure about the exact meaning of that) but she writes down what she feels like PHYSICALLY like stuff you WANT to get out of you but you just leave it out most times because its HARD to put in words! damnit she good.



oh for those who are confused, in deviantart you can post up photos and writing (such as poetry and prose and their friends) right, and anyone who is a deviant (anyone who has a deviantart account) can make it as a "favourite" if they like it.


theres the proof! i was shocked with joy aahahah its circled in red.
you might wonder "then whats the blue one for"?
WELL.
i checked my dA just now and apparently this person called "kustom-kicks" made one of my deviantID a favourite! im like WTH HAHAHAHAHA because i just uploaded it this morning and it was only a pic of me with my fist on my chin aahah how important is that? its a pretty shit pic as well since i was sick and cheeks were a tad bit chubby. oh well maybe she was bored and had nothing to do. lol. shes got some cool piercings though, i saw.

well mum called last night when dad, hanna and i arrived home from senayan. she said the wedding reception was at noon . i thought it would be in the evening... sigh i wonder what shes done today. id LOVE to go and kick my heels to the city. huhuh i chatted to sandra yesterday as well via facebook and i MISS HER SO BAD asked her to take me shopping once i get to melbourne hah! id have to work my butt of SERIOUSLY now and intend to be offline for 2 weeks (if that is even possible!) at LEAST on facebook (being offline). alright.

well i'll have to go off now ciao amigos!

A Letter for M&D

i miss my mum :'( and dad won't come home in a couple of hours.

Now I know I'm getting older and hugs are decreasing,
But that doesn't stop me from thinking you're missing.
Wish I could return back more than you gave me
Instead I often hide and won't let you see.
When I grow up I want to be just like you,
Tall, strong, and wise in the things you do.
I'd give my kids time no matter what during weekend,
And lend more than a shoulder when in need of a friend.
Though sometimes miles would keep us apart,
You should know that I love you, you're always in my heart.

wheat lover

SETAN.
blognya di private, hahah. ngga bisa baca2 colongan lagi dah gw hahaha
oh well, ya punya gw ngga bakal di private jadi FEEL FREE DEH LO TAU KEHIDUPAN GW PERASAAN GW, GW NGGA PEDULI HUH
knapa gw sebel sendiri ya? haha jadi inget si indah bilang kita itu "penguping" z z . lebih tepatnya sih kalo di dunia maya curi2 baca wall orang (mampus ngga tuh).
hari ini ngga jadi jalan kayanya. abisan tadi aja gw baur bangun jam 8, gila batuk makin parah dan badan masi anget, ngga mood gila awalnya mau bikin tugas jaid ngeblog. dan my tastebuds have gone NUMB. gw mau nikmatin roti bakar with melting nutella, peanut butter (hmmm.......) ternyata.... gw ngga bisa ngerasain apa2 sial. cuma cornflakes doang yang masi ada manisnya dikit.

gila ya gw tuh makan yang gandum semua. ngga tau knapa udah menjadi kebiasaan, terobsesi kali huh tiap pagi makan roti mulu kalo ngga sereal, nggaaaaaa bosen2. kemaren aja ya sarapan seperti biasa, roti. krn lagi ada strawberi jadinya gw potong2 tuh masukin di nutella, lumayan. trus gw ngiler ngeliat si lola beli donat yang stick itu, yg seribuan. udah gitu berangan2 beli roti isi keju dan susu. aaaaaa. tapi ngga beli. pulangnya GW MAKAN MIE. gandum LAGI. ckck. padahal ya di buku diet golongan darah sehat itu, gol darah O itu mestinya menghindari GANDUM. tae ah uda gitu dairy products juga! semuanya aja yang gw suka g aboleh! kata nyokap gw sih yauda kalo tubuh kamu ngerasa ga knapa2 sih gpp, ntar aja kalo udah 30an LOL.

(plus sebenernya di sela2 pelajaran gw pulang pengen makan sereal HAHAHAHA udah gila kali makannya itu mulu)

ntar malem mau ke GKJ nonton pertunjukan skolahnya adek gw. caelah anak SD sekarang gaul mainannya konser. hahaha

oh my :'(

this morning when i arrived in front of my class a few of my friends were talking and i wondered what it was all about, and turns out that OSN competition (National Science Olympics) selection was TODAY. we were shocked since we didnt get notified and havent studied one bit! so we decided to go to the staffroom and ask for infos.. and hell thankful we did coz turns out i got some devastating information .............

"Oh iya, jadi ini buat OSN, hari ini kita seleksi kalian dulu karena banyak peminatnya.."

and i thought.. NO KIDDING.

on tuesday i was sick and didnt come to skul so my friend texted me if i wanted to participate in a competuition ranging from maths, science subjets, and english. she said it was for the nationals, BUT when i asked is this the same like the bio comp that i was already signe up for, she said she didnt know. and i thought that it was a normal competition, general. so i signed up for ENGLISH.

which MEANS I WONT BE COMPETING IN BIOLOGY!! AND I HAVE STUDIED IT FOR WEEKS NOW OOHHHHHHHH MY GOOODDDDD i was feeling weak - i mean i had past exams copied, (and a LOT), BOOKS copied, sigh.. i need to tell my ma but she's in Melbourne right now and i dont know which email she is using..? i'll guess i'll have to wait after dad comes home.

and you know something, the selection test for english was like the exact one as preliminary round last year -________-

I'm baaaaaaack

well hello! i have decided to activate my blog again. wrong usage of language, hahah i mean ive decided to continue with blogging to save the trees! (save up paper) but the downside is we waste electricity instead, a friend said to me. i replied, well everything needs sacrifice.. LOL which is true but quite sad actually.

soo im gonna tell ya about my day. we had outing class, which means excursion apparently thats a misuse of language again by indonesians. we went to puspiptek which is pusat penelitian ilmu pengetahuan dan teknologi (research centre of science and technology). its located in serpong, and we went there by bus. the whole school went there which is a LOT of number i didnt expect we would all be going, but soo our class had fun though, and i hope we can be more solid :D

there are some funny pictures we took - goofing off as usual whenever we get the chance!



i'll continue tomorrow :D
catch ya later!
*nabs

hey :)

its bin a damn long time since ive made an entry here.. well anyway i was browsing and did this personality test.. just for fun

Your view on yourself:

You are intelligent, honest and sweet. You are friendly to everybody and don't like conflict. Because you're so cheerful and fun people are naturally attracted to you and like to talk to you.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:

You like serious, smart and determined people. You don't judge a book by its cover, so good-looking people aren't necessarily your style. This makes you an attractive person in many people's eyes. (whoaa so true, lol for the last part of sentence hahah)

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:

You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.

The seriousness of your love:

You like to flirt and behave seductively. The opposite sex finds this very attractive, and that's why you'll always have admirers hanging off your arms. But how serious are you about choosing someone to be in a relationship with? (flirt? hmm iya apa im not sure? haha)

Your views on education

Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can. (yes very right)

The right job for you:

You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life. (hmm..)

How do you view success:

You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous. (yep 100% right)

What are you most afraid of:

You are afraid of things that you cannot control. Sometimes you show your anger to cover up how you feel. (this is how i express things to my dad i guess.. lol)

Who is your true self:

You are full of energy and confidence. You are unpredictable, with moods changing as quickly as an ocean. You might occasionally be calm and still, but never for long. (yaa)